When You Let Me Go
by d34dstr3tch
Summary: Madoka is hope for humanity, and only Homura remembers her sacrifice. Her memories: a gift, but in a chance encounter what toll will these memories take?


The universe.

Homura Akemi was staring into the universe, and somehow it stared back.

Every class she had taken in a thousand timelines told her it was nothing more than shifting gas and light. But now she knew better.

What lay before her was pulsing supernatural energy.

Madoka's energy.

Enough to fuel eternity and carry out an incubator's prayer, it was all _her_ doing and yet Homura knew that on some strange planet a monster was soaking in undeserved praise- and he couldn't even appreciate it.

It was obvious that Kyubey would share in her memories of a kind girl and her wish that would determine his fate. If he failed, he wouldn't be disappointed - he wouldn't feel a thing; in his eyes she was little more than an obstacle. Barely an equal, barely a person. Just a flawed provider in his master plan.

Homura knew she was dreaming. The universe she saw was an image, no, a memory her mind had conjured while she slept.

This wasn't surprising. Her final memory of Madoka was one she pictured often. The sweet school girl transformed into a powerful goddess and mere concept of humanity; her thanks given, her wishes fulfilled.

Sure enough the girl appeared...

A warm smile sent shivers down your frame and despite Homura's terror she came toward her.

"Homura Akemi, it's good to see you again."

The girl cried out in a blend of desperation and joy before throwing herself into the deity's arms. She laughed and held her close, this was more than just a dream and both girls knew it.

"...Madoka, I- I tried everything and yet you..."

"Saved the universe and every girl to travel our path." Her voice hardened. "This is the only successful timeline we could produce, you need to accept that."

"No! I've come so far and I won't go back without you!"

The embrace was broken and over-ruled by silence; both girls' eyes swam with confusion and heartbreak.

When Madoka found her voice it was cold and distinctly out of place. "I can make you forget me, if that's what it takes."

"What? That's not what I want at all!"

"Well, sometimes we don't get what we want, do we!?" She was on the brink of collapsing, Homura knew it. "Sometimes we have to at least make _some _sacrifices. Sayaka and Mami and Kyoko all understood - so why don't you?"

"Maybe because I don't want to lose you! Maybe because I spent a thousand years trying to save you and now everything's gone to waste!" Tears spilled down her face and shone in reflected starlight. "Why are you so selfish?"

"Selfish? Are you serious? I've given everyone anything I held dear to me, I was a sacrifice to the universe, everyday I watch a family who doesn't even remember me and do nothing! When was I ever selfish?"

"When you gave me up!"

Both girls' tears mirrored each others. They stared and let the words pass between them. Their conversation would be written in eternity, let the universe be their witness.

Madoka was the first to break, collapsing into a sobbing heap. Homura was left speechless, doing nothing but watch as she cried.

"Fine! I don't need you, and there's no way that you deserve your memories!"

Tendrils of light erupted from emptiness and launched themselves at the stricken once-magical girl.

Pain exploded in Homura's ears, something wrapped around her lungs and _squeezed. _All she could see was pink. It was harder to grasp at thoughts and for a brief moment Homura suspected she was looking at her insides.

Or maybe it was Madoka.

Wait, what? For a second she... No. It didn't matter.

She gasped for a few shaking breaths before relaxing into darkness. Her eyes closed and with a surge, Homura lurched forward to hack blood onto her bed sheets.

Bed sheets?

Oh right, she'd been sleeping at the ward that night. Her practitioner had suggested she stay the night again, as her body had suggested a threat of heart disease. Homura definitely remembered coughing up all that blood, but she sure felt fine now.

"Must've been one hell of a nightmare to do that, huh?"

After deciding it was too hot for sheets anyway, Homura knocked back a collection of white pills.

"For sleeping," she whispered.

With nothing but the hospital gown on her back, Homura laid herself bare on the hospital bed and fell under a spell of dreamless slumber.

Night descended quickly for Japan, the entire country blanketed in darkness

A few minutes later, a storm swept through the city; with rain bitter as tears and a screaming wind that nearly howled the words: "What have I done?" and "I'm so sorry."

But the girl being addressed slept through the weather, oblivious to what had been taken from her and what she will never see again.


End file.
